Stay and Die



I woke up angry today

if you knew how I really felt

who I really am

(crazy sometimes)

would you still

want to play with me?


(would you delete me?)


I woke up afraid

hating my dream

analyzing the meaning

of panic




loose change and broken ATM’s

never catching up

peeing in strange bathrooms

on the floor

a man with a child in his arms


in my dreams (my reality?)

I am in a hurry

and yet

I pause to apply lipstick



in the mirror a woman

looks back, fear, pain, panic



girls ask me a question

in my purse is the answer

is it the rotting fruit you want?


I compose words

a speech I must give

tender words

sincere words

lonely words


maybe I don’t want to talk


it’s a maze

(my life I think)

I will be late

(because it’s not my time to join you or maybe it is)


I can see

a reflection of myself

this yellow skirt

too short

too sexy

for my mother’s






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