I found you lurking in (MY)space
our relationship began with confusion
moved on to peel away layers of illusion
progressed to disillusion
and yet
still
I can’t seem to turn away
I cursed you
refused to converse with you
deleted, refuted, denied your cyber presence
all the while knowing that if you had skin
I was embedded underneath it
pushing your buttons
inflating member(s)
pumping up the volume of your deceitful heart
pretending (to myself)
that I was special
and all the while
you play(ed) me
and I play(ed) you
neither of us wanting to let go
I never bought the grill
(I did buy that “something satin with lace”)
I never trusted your promises
although I wanted to believe your true lies
so here we lie years later
volumes of heart space occupied by smoke
mirroring each other
never making the connection
alone
with our fantasies
© Lynda Filler, True Lies I (Spy) Love
Lynda Filler 