Secrets

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© Lynda Filler Photography

 

Secrets

I know

your secrets

the kind the world

would kill for

the kind a woman

would die for

I know this about you

I know your weaknesses

the kind the world

would exploit

the kind a woman

would cherish

I know this about you

I hold your heart

although as yet

you do not know

it has been stolen

but I know this

         and you suspect this

about me

 

© Secrets, I (Spy) Love

Sex Toys and Videotape

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© Lynda Filler Photography

 

Sex Toys and Videotape

she stood before her mirror

anointing and appointing

black lace

silky sexy hose

satin ropes

silver hand cuffs

and a very long, very fat

toy

 

a boy’s toy for a man’s game

 

would it please him

would it seize him

embrace his imagination

inflame his passion

 

a camcorder rests impatiently on the bed

 

© Sex Toys and Videotape, The Love Fix

 

Follow Your Bliss

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© Lynda Filler Photography    Porto, Portugal

 

Follow Your Bliss

 

flaming amber mane

flying over banisters, ledges,

stairs you climb in your haste to kiss me

 

I smile

eager for a nuzzle

books lined up in doorways

“this shop is mine!” I cry

“you can’t fly, you silly ninny!”

I giggle as your chocolate eyes look solemnly into mine

 

I stroke your horse’s head

you shake your body, stand your ground and neigh

 

only in my dreams

do I make books,

and passionate horses fly

 

but why, dear girl,

do you deny flight light?

surely you must know

limitations exist

only in the confines of your mind

 

© Lynda Filler

 

If God Brings You To It…

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It was one of those days…

I’m over it, barely, but I did lose a good day or two of productive thinking because of it.

We’re all artists, writers, poets, painters, photographers, readers, and imagineers, lovers-of-life, dreamers. And as such we have good and bad days, and some of us have fragile egos.

I sent work off to an editor. I waited excited by a story I needed to tell. In my defense I do have to say that when writing fiction I try to plot. I do. That’s the way my famous author-friends do it. But I have an amazing imagination. I truly live my stories. I go inside the heads of my people. I’m in the forest in Serbia or on a jet over the Atlantic, or blowing up a boat in the Pacific, or parkouring over rooftops in Paris. It’s why I write—to tell stories.

However this is what happens when I plot. I get surprises. Yes, my characters do something I wasn’t prepared for… or a new storyline takes me by surprise. And that’s my challenge…

She said it was a hot mess. Well, those weren’t her words exactly. She sent it back half-edited and told me to get back to work. This is my 12th work to be published. I’m not yet on any best-seller lists, but I have people who love my stories and email me wanting to know when the next JET is coming out. So I pushed through the sadness I felt and I allowed myself to learn from the critique. I accepted the harsh words and vowed to become better and better at telling my stories. I am dedicated to giving my readers the best experience they can possibly have.

But I have to tell you I was devastated. I wanted to take the manuscript and throw it away. Instead I sat down and started reading it and making corrections. And you know something? I LOVE this story. It’s close to my heart. It’s speaks to me. And I hope it will speak to you too.

We should be on Kindle by next weekend if not sooner. JET-Displaced book in my JET Kindle Worlds series.

“If God brings you to it, He will bring you through it.”

http://goo.gl/fp5dAF

 

Please give some #twitter #LOVE to #SunilSharma

 

What Do The Readers Say? #Free #Poetry #Kindle

 

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Feelings for Lynda’s musings:

“What I love about your writing is how much I can read on the surface and how much color lays between the lines. Your words continue to be my shining star. Never ceasing to amaze, you bring me into the heart and soul of your Muse. Simply wonderful, Lynda.” Don MacIver, Poet, A Touch of Rose.

“Lynda, this one (Shallow) hit it on all the marks. Perfectly beautiful and intense, truthful write. Sharing. Wow!” Cherry Rose, Writer.

“Spot on, deep down, honest poetry from the heart, Lynda, just as it always should be. Totally loved it!” Chuck Steffen, Musician and Poet.

“The best kept secrets are the ones that a woman holds from the heart of the man she loves. They are so “cherished”. Ray Collins, Author & Poet, Heart of The Romantic Warrior.

“You are my inspiration!” Sabrina Helen Burum

“Lynda! Put a vice grip on my heart. I re-read and am speechless. Wow!” Jon Burgess.

“Beautiful. We should all paste this where we can see it as soon as we wake up.” Rose Aiello Morales, author of If You Find Zen at the Side of the Road, Don’t Tell Buddha.

 

In The Fall

 

I live

in the fall

of your vow

 

I have surrendered

against my will

 

your skill

overpowers

my need to have

(real) love (I can touch and feel)

 

but then, you ask

what is love

if not an eso(tear)ic concept

as one is overjoyed, overwhelmed

in lust—then not

 

is it so hard to accept

a love unconditional

one you know will always

hold your heart sacred

your soul precious

 

I wish I were an angel

a spirit, a dance, a whisper

I would disappear like the Wolf

lick my wounds, heal my body, nurture my soul

 

I wish I didn’t want

what you choose not to give me

 

but I do

 

I (Spy) Love    FREE KINDLE DOWNLOAD

https://goo.gl/ZeLuXi

 

Broken Hearts & Naked Selfies

 

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I LOVE that scientists have been testing the theories I’ve known in my heart to be true! The article referenced below is a study done in the UK about the effects of sudden loss on the physical heart.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2017/06/18/time-does-not-mend-broken-heart-scientists-find-condition-causes/

But… LOVE can heal it. Let me tell you why. I am my own study or WIP. And have my own theories as to why a heart given six months to live in 2008 still functions, quite beautifully I might add, in 2017! One of the things I stress in LOVE The Beat Goes On, my book on healing from Idiopathic Dilated Cardiomyopathy, is LOVE.

 LOVE in all its forms can both damage and I believe heal a physical heart.

When I was guided to write my story in 2016, I wrote it out with trepidation. It’s sort of like taking a naked selfie and looking at all the flaws. The real deal is the photo is meant for someone who loves you and only sees your beauty. It turns out that my “story” has been received in the same way. Those who’ve read the book see it for it’s love and honesty and ignore the author’s naiveté.

I cover the journey, not just the diagnosis and healing, but how I think I became ill  in the first place. “Idiopathic” means the doctors have no idea “why” my heart was functioning at 28% EF—that means pumping blood at about half it’s normal rate… swollen…stressed to the max. Sometimes it’s childhood trauma, or alcoholism, or smoking, or whatever… But the doctors couldn’t find any specific cause.

I have a secret: I’d been walking around with a problem heart for years. I kind of knew it from an EKG in the nineties that showed an irregular heartbeat. I had an appointment with a specialist right after that EKG and he said I was in good shape “for a 70 year old” when I was under fifty! He made a follow up appointment for months later. I felt okay; and in Canada appointments with specialists can be months apart, and I was working, and, well, you know what happened. Until I literally had the heart attack in early 2008, I forgot about that EKG and never went back to see a heart doctor.

I believe your journey, or your “story” is often what triggers dramatic illnesses in the body.

I think that’s something that more and more of us, and even the medical profession, are beginning to understand. Your story might not necessarily entail the loss of a loved one. It can be anger you carry around against an ex or parent or abusive adult. It might be the loss of a marriage, a cheating spouse, a money issue, a bankruptcy, the loss of your career. All these things if you allow them to build up trigger emotional and often physical damage to your body. The scientists are doing studies and lending credibility to my theory; but if you wait for the science to do something about it, you could be dead.

 

 

LOVE The Beat Goes On     Lynda Filler

Amazon

 

Life, Lust & Love

There is only one thingSometimes I forget.

OSHO sits on my night table. The Beloved is one of the few hard cover books I own. It’s the moving and traveling–the way I love to live my life.  It doesn’t lend itself to a library of hundreds, or thousands, of books.

I’m a nomad at heart. I could live my life on the road, stopping for a week here, another there–all the things that are important to me would fit into the back of my SUV.

Crazy? Rootless? I’d rather think of it as wander lust.

I also live in my mind. As long as I have books to read…thank you Steve Jobs for creating the iPad, and Amazon for the Kindle App–I can be happy anywhere. And something to hold the images like the one above taken in Sinora, Mex. on a solitary road trip from Puerto Vallarta, Mexico to Whistler, British Columbia. And always, I need something to write with; I couldn’t live without my writing.

I think I’ll make a new Canva photo/visionboard. If I was truly living my life on the road, I would add unlimited airmiles to my wish list. Then I could drop in on my son and his family in Paris whenever I felt like it.

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Or maybe I would work on my current novel in Venice, the ghost of Gabriel Allon nudging me to place a twist here, a romantic encounter there. Yes, I could live for a month or two in Venice.

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Love & lust take on many forms in my life.

As Osho would say, if you miss those moments of love–whatever and whomever you love–you’ve missed the whole opportunity of life.

Enjoy:    LOVE The Beat Goes On on Amazon     https://goo.gl/T9OKPS