What is one thing I can do to give my life a makeover?

This is a great question I was asked recently on Quora. I thought it would be worthy to share.

I spent most of my life running my own businesses or managing teams of people for other corporations. I can tell one thing about people that challenged me on a daily basis: lack of self-esteem and self love!

I’m assuming this question is coming from a woman—it feels like it; but even that is a sexist remark that shows you how I feel about this subject. People lack self-worth and don’t value their own talents and abilities the way they should.

Maybe my thoughts can help you.

Start a journal and on the first page, write a list of things about yourself that you LOVE. If you have to think about it and can’t come up with 5 things quickly, we have a lot of “making over’ work to do! I’ll give you mine right off the top of my head without any thinking:

I’m funny and make a friend easily. I’m entertaining, charming, and love to tease. I’m sexy—yes, at my age, I got it all going on! I’m an adventurer, in business and in my personal life, a goal setter, a dreamer, a believer in the goodness of mankind, a lover, I lead from the heart. I really like myself.

We are taught, or at least my upbringing taught me to be humble, not to brag, not to flaunt myself or my accomplishments, to be good at things but to not stand out or look for accolades. I say bullshit! If you don’t love yourself, who will? And if you don’t come from a place of love, how can you ever love another?

We come into this world alone, and we go out alone. And sometimes, most of the time, we take this journey called life, by ourselves. You better learn to love who you are, focus on your strengths, and let the other nonsense go. Never, ever put yourself down!

I feel like I could write a book about this, maybe I should! Actually, maybe I will. A lot of my thoughts and principles are in LOVE The Beat Goes On, a memoir. By the way, my books are free to read with Kindle Unlimited membership!

Good luck on this journey we call life. My advice to the hundreds of people I led every day is we only go through this world once. Learn to laugh off the nonsense, and play to your strengths. Learn to love yourself first, and the rest will fall into place.

What can older women say to younger women to help them mature faster?

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Thanks Pixabay!

I can keep it simple or make it complicated. Let’s assume that so many have answered this question already so I will keep it short and sweet.

LEARN to love you, yourself, first. Get rid of your stupid insecurities and focus on your amazing inner beauty. Don’ t let any guy/girl take away your confidence or tell you who you are/should be/should do! The sooner you learn your self-worth, the happier your life will be.

If you don’t believe that love is an inside job, look at the divorce rate. If we knew how to love ourselves, we wouldn’t get into some of the stupid relationships we choose when we’re young. And for some of us, we continue with the age-old definition of insanity: repeating the same action over and over again and expecting a different result.

The more confidence and self-love you have, the more likely you are to choose or be chosen by a man/woman who has the same thing going on. Likes attract.

If you spend your life looking for your soulmate you miss the opportunity to really connect with the soul-mate-that is-you!

I want you to remember these words forever: you should be your first and last love. You are the only one that can truly keep you safe and warm at night. LOVE yourself first.

 

as answered by Lynda Filler on Quora

And pick up a copy of LOVE The Beat Goes On, “When your doctors give you six months do live, what do you do?”  Lynda Filler’s memoir on healing.